Family and Drugs: What to do?

familia y drogas

The familiar surroundings is the passive patient that a person with problems of addiction to the drugs involves, like a passive smoker that also sees  prejudiced by the toxic attitude of a near person. By this reason, the first step to put solution to a problem of this type is that the own family assume the problem and take consciousness of the same, say: “My son is drogadicto and have to put him brake”. The family and surroundings nearer of the affected is extremely important in the help to leave the drugs.

The family, first brake to the drugs.

One of the most widespread beliefs is that the addicted person will not be able to solve his problems until it take consciousness of them, this is true, but also is true that the family is key so that this taking of consciousness take place. The family is the core of the development of our biological capacities, psychological and social.

These three pillars of the model biopsicosocial coincide with the majority of treatments of the consumption of drugs of the clinics of detoxication where the family and surroundings is part of the process of recovery and therapy. Besides, the own family receives orientation and therapy to be necessary because as we already said are affected secondary that need also of skilled attention.

Some of the problems associated to the families with an addicted member are:

  • Economic problems. The addicted person needs money to purchase the substance and will resort to to ask to the family, which in a lot of cases accesses to avoid the clash or the thefts.
  • Social isolation. In a lot of cases, the person isolates  of the surroundings family taking the house as if it was a hotel, going only to sleep or to eat or even ausentándose during days without warning. The communication in the family sees  impoverished and  full of lies, excuses and inappropriate justifications. The dependency of the drug and the effect craving (wish of consumption) generate in the person a reality distorted that refuses the rational arguments of his family and friends, what carries it to lose friendships, relations and even the communication and relation with his more direct family.
  • Physical and psychological maltreatment. The dependency of the drugs derives in manipulation of the people of his surroundings, vexations and even physical violence. . We remember that in no case it has to  justify the maltreatment of any type for being the person under the effect of the drugs, the violence never is justified, has to be condemned and take the precise measures. Of not to do it like this, what achieves  is an effect stairs of the violence in which every time it will go to more. For example, if your couple abuses you under the effect of the drugs, included the alcohol, keeps on being maltreatment and violence of gender by what the measures that have to take have to be the same. In fact, the violent person will justify  of the aggression blaming to the consumption of drugs or to that was drunkard and this in no case is a justification, only is an excuse.
  • Invisibility. Related with the previous. The person no longer sees to the people of his surroundings with emotional value but the cosifica giving priority in his life to the access to the consumption.
  • Psychological problems. The feelings of culpability and the situations estresantes that produce  together with the fear to what can sucederle to the person affected are bad mates for the depression and the anxiety of the families. It is another of the reasons by which the family suffer like secondary patients victims of the drug addiction of his familiar or gathered.

>> Article related: Phases of the alcoholism

What can do to help to my familiar or fellow addict to the drugs?

Attain that the addicted person take consciousness is the big challenge of the family since his answer is the opposition to all class of help because of the negation of the situation like problematic. They tend to think that have everything under control although it was not like this, suffer cognitive distortions of the reality that will carry always to his terrain.

In the first place, the support has to be unconditional. It is very difficult to treat with an extraneous person to the reality but have to be  near to take advantage of the best moment to attain the ‘click‘ of taking of consciousness of the problem.

It is important that the support avenges of a person respected by the affected that will generate an effect leader on the change of behaviour. By the contrary, have to avoid  or keep moved away to people that was antagonists to the affected or that do not comprise the problem since it will see it like an enemy and only will create more violent situations and discussions. It is not the moment to judge to the person.

Establish limits.

Unfortunately, the people with problems of addiction are used to to take consciousness when a greater event or limit occurs: a legal problem (arrest by theft, violence), social and familiar problems grave (split of relations, economic problems, loss of work, etc…) Or problems of health  (derived of the consumption or by overdose). It is in this moment when the person finds  more delicate and when taking advantage of his moment of bajón emotional has to supply  the reinforcement and support that redirect to the person to the treatment of the problem of the addiction since it will be much more susceptible to the change. Of not acting fast, the person will go back to go in in the loop of consumption and opposition.

These situations limit can occur of natural form like the already quoted or of form caused where the familiar intervention goes back  paramount. The dependent people of substances see his world of extraneous boundless way to the reality or manipulate it to avoid them, by what is fundamental to establish limits of form asertiva For example, establish schedules of food, fix schedules of arrival home or to raise , establish a control on the money, delete privileges (game console), not allowing that it joint  with friends that also drug , etc.

The person has to learn to value what has and will originate some feeling of culpability by not attaining go in inside the limits stipulated, the drug will generate less pleasure and this situation of weakness will serve to achieve the taking of consciousness to the ‘click‘ that allow to initiate the change to the treatment. When seeing  limited, the person will darse that it needs help since only it is not able to have the privileges that before yes had by what will show  more opened to receive help.

In definite, know say that ‘no’. This is used to to be a difficult step to do by the feeling of culpability that generates the not to give him to a be wanted to what asks but has to be  strong to attain the change. Here it is where the professional therapeutic help is fundamental to achieve an optimum familiar support. If have a familiar that think that can have problems with the drugs, attends to a professional centre to receive orientation and do not expect to that your be wanted to hit rock bottom.


Iván Pico

Director y creador de Psicólogo Colegiado G-5480 entre otras cosas. Diplomado en Ciencias Empresariales y Máster en Orientación Profesional. Máster en Psicología del Trabajo y Organizaciones. Posgrado en Psicología del Deporte entre otras cosas. Visita la sección "Sobre mí" para saber más. ¿Quieres una consulta personalizada? ¡Escríbeme!

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